The Pros and Cons of Being A Stay-At-Home Mom

Hi there readers!  Are you thinking of making the big plunge into a becoming a single income home?  My husband and I made this decision and took that giant leap 7 years ago.  It is actually my seven year anniversary of being a stay-at-home-mom.

Just a little back story first before I share my pros and cons list.  I was in retail as a store manager for Steve Madden, then an operations manager for Sephora, an assistant manager for Bebe and lastly a shop manager for a “world famous” tattoo shop.  I have been in charge of schedules, organization, cleanliness and staff for a very long time.  My schedule, however, was inconsistent, and most jobs like this require you to be flexible and work different shifts.  Sometimes these shifts were until midnight, sometimes they started at 6:00 am.

The Solution

My husband’s job involved travel.  There was a lot of money to be made in him sacrificing time with family to set-up trade shows out of state.  My job and his job didn’t work well together with a child in the mix.  I was constantly having to be the parent that called out of work if my daughter was sick.  We didn’t have reliable or regular help from family or friends.  Something had to change, so we sat down crunched the numbers and found a way to make it work.

We found that with what we were paying in childcare, gas, car insurance, etc. me working was really only bringing in a very small amount of money after expenses each month.  When I say small, I mean small, like the cost of a cellphone bill.  Why were we doing this?  I was constantly tired, trying to run my house manage someone else’s business, and most importantly… raise a child.  So we went to a single car home, (my husband doesn’t need a car if he is taking airplanes everywhere), cut out childcare and we were on our way.

The Wrench

When I left the paycheck earning club, it was as if a weight had been lifted.  Volunteering for everything I could at my daughter’s elementary school was possible.  I grocery shopped during the day on a Tuesday, cleaned house, managed my home, couponing, I even made a garden.  It was awesome!  But then, we decided to have another baby!  What were we thinking?!  Our perfect, well oiled machine of a home just had a wrench thrown in it.

Just kidding, I love my son and have zero regrets.  But seriously, staying home with a baby and a then a toddler is a completely different experience than what I had become accustomed to.  So here I am, seven years later with two different stay at home mom experiences with a few of my pros and cons.

Stay-At-Home Mom Pros and Cons

PROS

• Available for your child(ren). It is nice to be able to help with homework, volunteer in the classroom, or take them on your own weekday “field trips”.  Also, not having to stress over a random sick day is huge.
• Weekday freedom.  I can grocery shop during the weekdays when the stores are not busy.  Going to the zoo, museums or other activities tend to be less crowded too.
• No work related expenses.  When working in retail and/or management positions appearance is important.  Staying “in style” and well put together can turn into quite the expense.  I prefer to wear t-shirt and jeans daily, which is a pretty inexpensive wardrobe.  Also, my family no longer needed a second car without a work commute, less gas, less insurance, less maintenance.  Did I mention childcare expenses?! $$$
• Holidays.  When I stopped working in retail, I got my holidays back!  No more missing Thanksgiving for Black Friday shoppers.  Trick-or-treating with the kids could happen.  Around the holidays, we have the ability to see out of town family.
• Bargain shopping.  I know that plenty of people both work and are able to save money bargain shopping.  Me, I had a hard time with this.  I now have the flexibility to shop at different stores for specific items, which can save a ton of money.  Trips to Costco, Trader Joes, Fry’s and Sprouts can be done at my convenience.

CONS

• It can get lonely.  This is the biggest con for me and I know a lot of stay-at-home moms have this issue as well.  You really have to try to stay social and get out with your kids.  Also set up playdates with other parents so that you have an opportunity to chat with adults.
• Self care tends to come last.  So many mommy bloggers write about the importance of self care, and they are totally right.  I find myself neglecting my own up keep, I mean I shower daily and get dressed, but eyebrows, nails, pedicure maybe even a massage every now and then does wonders for my self esteem and mental health.
• People will think that you sit around in your pajamas all day and watch Netflix.  Ok, I will admit there have been days when I just want lay around and watch Orange is the New Black or GOT.  But this is not every day, in fact it is VERY rare and I tend to stay busy all day.  Taking care of a child is work, cleaning up after that child is WORK, cooking, grocery shopping, watching other children, WORK, WORK, WORK.  This may not be the case for every stay-at-home parent, but with me, I don’t get to leave work at the end of the day.  It just keeps on going, bleeding into the next day and the day after that, etc.
• No Paycheck.  Even though my husband says that I am doing a very important job and that he appreciates every thing that I do… I sometimes feel like I need to contribute financially.  We then go back through the logistics of me returning to work.  For now, while we still have a child under 5, remaining at home makes the most sense.

Honestly, you are going to have to make your own pros and cons list to decide if this choice is right for you.  If there is one thing that I do know from this past 7 years, it is that being a stay at home mom is a full time job, with tons of overtime.  You get paid in kisses, hugs, tears and tantrums but it is worth it.  I do miss the paycheck and the adult interaction but I wouldn’t have changed the past seven years in any way.

If you are a stay at home mom, I would love to hear some of your pros and cons in the comments section below.

Thanks for reading!

April aka ZonaMom

Follow me on Social Media

• 
• 
• 
• 
•